Blind man walking

I saw a blind man cross the street today.  I've seen such things before but today it struck me how brave you must become when you lose something most people take for granted.  He stepped off the sidewalk at the crosswalk with boldness and walked with unhitched step to the other side.

This struck me today because someone I love has chosen to withhold their love from me.  They are angry with me.  In their eyes, I have treated them with disrespect.

People get offended for all sorts of reasons.  That's not what this post is about.  This also isn't about guilt or who's right or wrong.  Ultimately it doesn't matter.  The result, in my case, is a loss of relationship with someone important to me.  With someone who's love most people take for granted.

Luckily, I've been praying about and for this person for some time.  God, in His mercy and love, has shielded my heart from most of the hurt.  I have several choices in how to act and respond.  Leave them be to give them space, act the same as I always have, go out of my way to show love.  All of these options have merit and downfalls.  All of them can, and probably will be, misinterpreted.  I can't change their heart or mind.  I will leave that in God's hands.  My job is to examine my own heart, test my motives and honor God...

and then step boldly into the crosswalk.

I had a dream

I woke this morning from an interesting dream.  There is no way I can paint the emotional backdrop of this dream appropriately.   There is also no way it will make sense in the way my heart experienced it.  That makes the dream sound profound and epic and perhaps sets the bar higher than I intend.
It was a pastoral scene.  Rolling hills, ponds and trees held a picnic and relay like competition.  I was on a team with my husband, Vince and Sarah.  I felt  the pressure in my chest that often accompanies the competitive spirit roaring to life.  (Even now the dream fades from my memory and so I can't remember all the tasks) The competition required running to stations and puzzle solving, just the kind of thing our group of four excels at.
The problem was this, I knew I was dying. I had tried to prepare my husband.  I had tried to prepare and plan so that they wouldn't have to worry about anything when I died.  I made sure to take all my clothes so that the sight of them wouldn't make him sad.
An attendant came during the last challenge and told me that the plane was ready to go.  I got the impression that everyone knew I was dying, even my team, and we just hoped to have enough time to finish the competition.  Someone had made arrangements for me to hitch a ride on a transport plane and it couldn't wait any longer so I had to leave my team.
Weirdness of the dream aside, as I got on the plane I had one burning motivation.  I needed to finish preparing for my death by cleaning and purging the house.  I needed to make sure that I would be seen and remembered with a clean house, free of care.  A workman approved.  A Proverbs 31 woman.
I woke with the certainty that I needed to clean the house.  Deeply, well and with diligence.    

Dreams are interesting indeed.

The truth is I should be living each day as if it were my last.  I should be cleaning my house as if I will have a guest any second and as if the greatest honor I could do my husband was to care for his home with perfection.  I don't know if the first day of spring mixed with my guilt and was nudged by Biblical principles to send me a dream that would motivate me to action but spring clean fever has well and truly struck.

That was a long break - Convention Costume Final Shots

I realized recently that I didn't give you any of the finished group shots of last years SL ComicCon costumes.  We got a lot of attention as Gracie Law (or the girl with green eyes) and LoPan.  In fact, as we were walking to the building some lady made her shuttle pull over so she could yell from the open door "GRACIE LAW!!!!"  I think these are going to be cycled into a regular con schedule.    

No one recognized us for Marvel Noir day which my brother was sad about but we discovered sushi burritos so I consider that a win.  

A total of 4 people recognized Agatha Heterodyne and Gilgamesh Wolfenbach.  That wasn't a big deal because John still got stopped often because the hat he made was so stinkin' cool.  It was a big hit.  I personally think this will make it back in the con rotation because it was comfortable and I felt like we looked good which contributes to the aforementioned comfort.




We are already starting to throw ideas around for 2016 because heaven forbid we take a break ;)





Now to the reason why it's been so long.  After Comic Con we went to visit family, had way to many funerals to attend and then started work for Gamefest at Starfest Denver.  We've done a ton of escape rooms this year, somewhere around 22.  I've also been hard at work trying to make sure the organizations I volunteer for have up to date yearly calendars and doing the whole marketing thing.

In at least two areas of my life I've been asked to step into a leadership role.  This has been challenging.  Not only has there been spiritual warfare associated with it but there have been some internal brain talk that hasn't helped me either.  I have spent a large percentage of my life avoiding leadership.  There are a couple reasons for this.  I have organizing skills, and an almost fanatical work ethic.  I do not have the patience, understanding or diplomacy to convince people that they should do what they say their going to do when the say they're going to do it.  This generally makes me the girl friday to the people in leadership.  I am confident that the Lord arranged these leadership opportunities partially because I didn't ask for them.  I am also confident that the Lord is going to do this.  I know I can't do this and I KNOW that God can.  The challenge now is remembering that God is going to do this rather than noticing the challenges, hurtles and obstacles.  That's true of anything I can think of.

Like all of you, my life is full.  Troubles and triumphs galore.  I've had tons of profound thoughts recently *har har* but didn't get them down before they were gone.  Sorry about that.  But it has reminded me to come back and at least give you an update.

Costume Progress - Misc

So my hubby has pretty much finished his Gilgamesh Wolfenbach "schmott guy" hat.  The flame effect has required some tweaking.  It was a little unstable so he had to add an insert to help stabilize the flame machine and to add stability for wear.  

The 3D printing of the Agatha's trilobite necklace and clank is finished and the minor bits of painting and sewing that were required are finished.

Dr. Strange's top hat, that my hubby flocked, is finished.  His accent turned out great.











The Lopan hat, also pepikura'd, is finished.  Yarn was glued on to add accent and then the whole hat was resined for strength.

Silver Sable is waiting to be finished because I'm too intimidated to finish right now.  I've got most of it done.  I just have to finished the collar, redo the skirt join, sew the front and back of skirt together, hem, attach the top and bottom and add the zipper.  As I think I've said before, this is the most ambitious sewing project I've ever done.  It's far from professional.  I've had to redo quite a few parts.  Overall, it's Noir, and the accents are definitely Silver Sable.  Even if no one else knows who she is, I'll finally have cosplay as the character I love from the comics.


We've also been asked to make wings for a friends costume.  She's doing the Aviatrix for our Marvel Noir costume day.  The hubby designed them based on the comic and worked a contraption to attach them to the backpack.

We have a few more things to finish overall but mostly we're looking ahead to figuring out how we're going to get this all on the train for the trip to the convention.  We're probably going to have to make our own hat boxes to carry our hats safely.

Costume Progress - Gracie Law

It's taken me a while to get back to working on the head dress for several reasons.  It was almost done and therefore not a priority on my list of things to do.  I did however complete the head dress and went back and restamped the dress with a sparklier fabric paint because the first fabric paint was much duller and hardly could be seen as gold.

I plan on wearing a red and gold corset to give me shape and to act as the Obi.  If I have time I'd like to partially line the sleeves because the fabric is shedding strings and could use some help.

 So here is is.  3D printed feathers adapted and modeled by my hubby and printed on his favorite toy and then spray painted with glitter paint.  Air dry clay made by hand and painted gold.  Headband.  Piece of felt formed, beads glued on, trim glued on, pearl sewn on.  Side wings hand drawn and painted, bead trim glued on.  Pearls glued on feathers.










Vintaj brass accent baked with gold embossing powder, beads and tassel attached.

Most of it's stuck together with craft or hot glue.  I'm still a little nervous about how things will hold together on a train ride to the con and then a trip to the airport and then regular bumping and heat at a normal convention.





 I'm very happy with how it turned out.  The good news for you is that I won't be costume dumping on Gracie Law anymore.  I do have progress on Agatha and Silver Sable.  I promise the next costume update will be full of other things.

PS.  Putting this thing on is a practice in fearful tension.  You don't want to bump or pull anything off so you gingerly keep trying to hold it in a different place so you have a good grip and don't drop it while trying to get it on your head.  It's quite comical.



After Silver Sable's last costume dump I went back to the drawing board and took on a very ambitious sewing project.  It's driving me to the edge, I'm not going to lie.  I hate not being good at things and I am not good at sewing.  Despite those facts, I think I'll feel so much more true to Silver Sable.  People still won't know who I am but that's okay.

In other news, progress on the Mystery Dinner Party script is progressing.  I've been hitting a wall on the next stage but I have been creating content.  I tend to make my mysteries very complicated...or at least it feels that way to me trying to hold it all in my head.

Costume Progress - Gracie Law Headdress

I have been busy making commercials, participating in G.I.S.H.W.H.E.S and generally being too busy for my brain capacity.  I have however made progress on the head dress that I think it worthy of note.

I drew out the side wings, started gluing on the feathers and generally continued in the trial and error or making.

I made the swan head out of air dry clay.  I had some issues with getting it to keep it''s shape once formed so I used some scrape pieces of paper to hold the curves I wanted it to take.

I then painted it gold with some basic acrylic craft paint.  I took a piece of craft wire and speared the clay and then pined it to the now firm felt and added hot glue to fill in the gaps.

We had to print some more feathers to help fill in the gaps and extend the gold feathers past the aqua marine wings.  

This is the shot from the back and the shot below is from the front.  I know the head form is backwards but because the head form's face tilts, I was having a hard time getting the front centered because of that slant so I just turned it around so I could keep things as centered as possible.  Now the only thing that's left is to glue on some pearl accents onto the feathers and make the dangles that hang from the furthest hanging feathers. 

 My only concern at this point is that the heat of the con may start melting some of  the hot glue and therefore compromise the stability of the feathers and wings.  I'm going to probably supliment some super glue.  The con is always the gauntlet.  I am pleased with the progress thus far and even if I don't complete the accents I have planned I'm pretty sure this is going to stand on its own .  Sure the beads may fall off and the feathers may fall off...I have these pictures and it's beautiful.

I have settled on a pattern that I am happy with for Silver Sable and if I have time I'll make a practice version before I get the final fabric.  I've been struggling mightily with Silver Sable.  I'm not a thin woman and since Silver Sable is one of my childhood loves, I didn't want to be lame....especially since my husband and brother's cosplay for the marvel noir day is pretty awesome.

costume progress - Big Trouble in Little China Gracie Headdress

 

So, let's start with the progress on the Big Trouble in Little China Gracie Headdress.   I purchased a piece of blue felt which I then cut into the shape I wanted.  At first I thought a good heavy starch was going to work.  I quickly reevaluated that thought.  So I pulled out some Modge Podge and thought, I'll do double duty and glue the beads on while I'm also shaping the felt in place.....this did not work.  At least the beads were not sticking to the felt with just modge podge.  So I pulled out dimensional modge podge.  This worked better......except that I had already sprayed the felt with starch and painted it with modge podge so ... it was a little soaked by this time.  So While I'm trying to keep the dimensional modge podge from dripping and placing beads and trying to keep them in place, the felt starts dripping a mixture of starch and modge podge down the head form.  Neadless to say this part was a mixture of trial and error but mostly error.  The end result is pretty near perfect however.

I had purchased a peacock glitter head band to act of the base of the head piece.  This seemed like the best way to have an easy to wear and sturdy base.  I cut out some card board using the inside and outside curve of the headband and then covered the front and back in the leftover felt pieces.  I hot glued this on to the head band and painted the inside of the card board.  This is going to act as a support for the feathers.


My husband 3D printed an assortment of sizes.  He free formed  this from a reference image and has been printing me feathers ever since.








I spray painted them with a gold glitter paint.  I'm realizing this is hard to see on my brown table at night.  You'll get a better idea with future pictures.  My first can got some glitter out and then just started spitting clear paint....so I tried to shake and shimmy and pull to make it stop and it wouldn't....so I put the cap back on intending to let it run out of aerosol so I could return it and get a new can.  The lid and the spray button shot off like a gun!!!  Scared me and my husband out of our socks!  Thankfully the second can hasn't blown up.

 So now I have glued on the gold edging and sewn on the pearl.  Once all the glue and starch dried it's holding its shape perfectly by itself.  Next steps will include making the peacock and gluing the feathers in place.  I'll also need to figure out the tasseled dangles.  That will be last looks though so I'm not thinking too hard about that.  My hubby wanted to design a peacock head that was filigreed so he could print it on his 3D printer.  I told him that would look lovely but wouldn't be accurate.  I think he will think of a way to use his new toy no matter what the project.